tagging along, the little brother with the older brother's cool friends, just sort of watching from the wings, not really a part of it, but still there. or like Mike Dexter, trying to move on, looking ahead to college girls, not realizing that they are nothing but high school girls all grown up, but just more of the same, on the outside looking in, when before i used to be on the inside. like Kat in 10 things, but not quite. inside/outside perspectives change, feelings of belonging, actual sense, purpose, logical reasons for being a part of something, some group, some organization. not grown up, not childish things put away, just different, shifted gears, spheres of influence. in what used to be home, second home, first home, but now, it's like air, or it's like water, and i'm no longer a fish, or a newt, or a tadpole, or more like a, not sure what, but just from one environment to another, and it's looking back, looking over, maybe hanging on, maybe reminiscing, maybe just missing. good days, good times, but it just doesn't fit as well as it used to.