work, not work, homework, not homework, work, studying, troubleshooting, it's all the same after a while no dawson's tonight, i seem to have moved on already, attention spans shortening, too much needs to be done, can't concentrate on any one thing for any extended amount of time unless it's C++ which requires fanatical devotion no earth: final conflict for past two weeks, missing shows i thought i wouldn't miss things that might have been important to me at one point in my life still scared of bars of alcohol, social situations with people, talking, laughing, having fun, dancing, there's something i could do, fearful of adulthood, responsibility old hat, tired, repetitious, somethings just don't change, she should have been mine, should still be mine, no reason, no logic why she isn't except for the cold hard fact that i'm at work alone