bittersweet. a movie about a beast, a television show about teenagers, and then there's my life. first, godzilla. action movie given, but sad, man made man destroyed, all it did was try to live, that's all i'm trying to do, is live. dawsons creek, love without ever saying it. love through physical means, without the spoken words, but i guess the emotions, the history, all that behind it. will she still sleep over? good question. a night on the rocks, walking through this campus, which is kind of empty, but not quite, late at night, still people few they may be, wandering, couples together on the rocks, careful of which cement block i choose to sit on, to eat my dinner, and ponder, and dwell on the emotions that i feel, which i do feel. emotions. hated those, for the longest time, didn't think i had them, suppressed them, listened to reason, listened to facts, truths, stuff you think about, not stuff you feel about, stuff you believe in. too bad it's all a part of what life is. like a combo meal. i don't have life figured out at all. it's just as puzzling now, as it was when i was 2, 12, or that amazing junior year of high school. it has its question marks, but it's still life, and i'm still living. alone, but living. no more escapes from reality 'till next season, true callings send me forth, smile, wink, and nod, walk quietly, stand tall, words on paper or monitor, but not actions.