summer heat, greases wheels, but deadens the mind, and without a girl to have, or to pine for, the mind is left, the desire is bored, impetus, long gone and lost, what equation has temperature and love as factors, some parameter based on have/have not a significant other, but to desire, wish for someone, driving down route 14, past cary, into barrington, and thinking, remembering, it's been a long time since i'd remembered, and maybe it was the talk of the wedding, that gets me thinking, that opens all the gates that were shut long ago, and i remember white 1" binders, transparent pages, and magazines, i wonder if she used them, i wonder if they came in handy, i look back over things i'd written, things i'd thought, not so long ago, but even longer than that, looking at pictures, enjoying the pictures, damn, she was fine, and now i remember good times, i remember sweet times, and i forget, or at least selectively remember, and i smile, pink cotton candy memories tugging at the corners of my mouth, so many regrets, wishing for the continuance of an alternate history, if things hadn't happened they way they had, and all that springs from it