melancholy strikes, summer, nope, spring more like it, finally, april showers, but sunlight continues to stream down, a slight glance up brings vertigo, no longer balanced, warm and cold water in separate ears, turning left and right, exit 92, and side projects, distractions, eyes on the prize, if a prize was in sight, getting lost in the details, the miscura, little things like sleep and food and water, but sometimes, you've got to ask, and wonder, and wish and pray, and thoughts return, and wonderings continue, if i had done something, acted differently, just pursued instead of confused, tigers in the plains, stalking, lions, patiently working the herd, cheetahs chasing, sprinting for the kill, all animals whose names i can spell, but caught, dragged down, ripped flesh to feed children, bones left under trees of shade, deep in the heart of africa, highs and lows, roller coaster life, roller coaster living