words from a ledge, and i stand, alone, with my back to the wall, body sore from a short day of ultimate, and questioning, the future and what it holds, 3 years, asked, wondered, pondered, 25, supposed small things, banana nut mini muffins, remembered well, even by my mother, and some memories can be good, and always will be, just need things to bring them up to the forefront of the mind's eye, and once there, wallow and wail, drown and exhale, but futures, acceptances of the present, conditions, unharsh, harshless, but the ground was cold, a little wet, snow melting, but movies watched, then mailed, with many returns, and plans, mice and men, awry, better things always left unsaid, and pondered, pigpens of the mind