fear, fear from a glimpse, a glance, a wonderment of what is to come, what used to be, what never was, and how something so simple opens up so much, a reverse funnel, the spray setting on a garden hose, but that's all it was, a simple smile, but upon receipt a thousand questions, what, why, for what reason, and even with a newfound understanding, a realization, it still bothers, it still sticks, irritates, dirt under the fingernail, unable to shrug it off, and hopefully one day i will, i will return, and maybe that in and of itself is the reason, and the snake eats its tail.