a sliding doors moment, and then what? how would I be different, with all those environmental changes, the social circles, the interests. how much of the science fiction and fantasy, the games, the philosophical, the mental masturbation, the thinking, the proding, the guessing and writing, journals, and questions, always the questions, but really how much would me be me? what would I have done, gotten really into, what project, what interest would i have had? and i don't think it would have been the same, i really don't think so, and how much i am, and how much i like who i am, and the sliding doors moment me, not even sure i'd want to be that me