close, and stolen, and unexpected. all these things and more. and realizations, unaffected, in shock? unknown, undiscovered, new ground, shaky ground, sand and rocks and pebbles, when just that quickly, gone. frailty. where strength is imagined. bigger words with capital letters, logic and thinking only carries so far, when faced, face to face, with tears, with cries, with shock. it happens so suddenly, without expectation, and it's that suddenness, the unappointed time, it is that which shocks, which rattles foundations. prepared? imaginings. It's norhing more than words written down, on paper, in html, in the mind, a guessed at backbone that's never been tested, a theoretical life, lived in the laboratory, without real world experience, and then released to the wild. it's a whole different world. the head only holds so much sway over the heart.